Experience brings familiarity.  Sometimes.  What we don’t know is a mystery.  Death is a mystery.  And is surrounded by myths.  Bringing curious investigation to any and all experiences may discover truths.  Myths could be proven or disproven.

For instance, death is not an emergency.  The body of your loved one can be taken care of at home… with a little preparation (and some ice packs).  In fact, if the death occurs in an institution, you could move the body to your home for lying in.  A funeral home, funeral director, and embalming are not required, though their expertise with handling corpses can sometimes be helpful.  Granted, there is official paperwork that must be filed, but Access Nova Scotia can help.

 

 

The ritual cleansing of the dead has been practiced in some form in almost every culture for thousands of years.  It is natural and normal.  And can go a long way to facilitating a healthy grieving process.  Caring for and honouring our dead is absolutely sensible….. and a logical extension of the love and care we have for each other from the time of birth.

Think about it.

Is it possible to take delight in everyday life?  What is delight?  Is it a feeling?  And experience?  A way of being?

Of the light…

And how is it possible to be delighted?  Of what benefit?

Contemplate what gives you a feeling of delight, what makes you delighted – whatever that means to you.  Allow yourself to be immersed in a memory of experiencing delight…. the birth of a new human being, picking and eating fresh, home grown tomatoes, listening to a favourite piece of music, breaking into uncontrollable laughter, and on and on.  What delights you may be different from what delights anyone else… but there do seem to be some common denominators.

What does it feel like?  Where is it felt?  Is it something you might like to cultivate?  Can it be cultivated?

Experiment with bringing to mind (and heart) the memory-feeling of that which delights you.  Are you able to call it up?  Can it be sustained?  How might it be valuable to practice being delighted?  To delight others?

Try smiling at perfect strangers on the street, in the grocery store, or wherever you go.  What happens?

My experience is a state of warmth and openness in my heart centre, and a lightness in my ‘being’.  I endeavour to become more and more familiar with this ability to be totally present, open, and appreciative now.  I suspect it might serve me (and others) very well…. especially at the time of death.

 

Life can be dangerous, full of unexpected happenings, and generally has an abrupt ending.  It is frail and fleeting…. and precious.  Knowing all of that, one might imagine that we would appreciate the sacredness of every moment of experience.

The opportunity is certainly available… to recognize the precarious beauty of now.  This very moment will never come again.  Although it may be gruesome or terrifying, ugly or disgusting, it is, nevertheless, our unique experience.

There is a danger in pretending otherwise, in wishing for another now.  There is a danger that we may miss our life… while we wait for it to happen.

If we are habitually looking forward (or backward), there is a danger that satisfaction, contentment, and joy might never be experienced.

Mahatma Gandhi said “Live as if you were to die tomorrow.  Learn as if you were to live forever”.

I suggest that the living needs to be full of loving.  Loving that we have the gifts we have been given – whatever they may be.  And loving that we are able to give those gifts until the moment of death… and perhaps beyond.

Know what happens when your food and yard ‘waste’ is composted?  Eventually, with a little water, air, and time, soil is produced and can be used to grow more life.

How about the decomposition of your body?

“Composting is an aerobic method (meaning that it requires the presence of air) of decomposing organic solid wastes.^[1] It can therefore be used to recycle organic material. The process involves decomposition of organic material into a humus-like material, known as compost, which is a good fertilizer for plants.”

If your corpse is given the opportunity to rest in ground that is alive, it too will become healthy soil.

However, our current burial practices include techniques to avoid decomposition by embalming the body, putting it in a polyester and steel lined casket which is then dropped into a polymer-lined concrete vault creating a long-term toxic soup, some of which seeps into our water supply.

Or one could opt for cremation and create a giant carbon footprint on the way out.

Green burial is an option for corpse disposal that allows the body to decompose naturally and nourish the soil.  Think about it.

 

How do you want to die?  Since death is certain, it might be good to consider the possibilities.

Do you want to die at home?  Or in a forest?  Or on the high seas?

While cooking?  Skydiving?  Making love?

Do you want to be alone?  With family or friends?  Hooked up to life saving machines, surrounded by strangers?

Think about it.  Then talk about it.  Then write it down, and share it with those who care.  That’s called a directive.

There are many names for this document.  Advance Directive is common.  In Nova Scotia, Personal Health Care Directive is used.  The name is not important.  The contents are.

Unless you contemplate, discuss, and document your end-of-life wishes, and choose a delegate (someone to speak for you if and when you are unable), there is no reason to expect that anyone will know what you want.

And putting it off is equally foolish.  Death comes without warning.  If you are lucky, it will not come until you are old and frail and ready to go.  But, as we know, every day many folks die unexpectedly… and in bizarre circumstances.

Do not continue to move this task to the bottom of your list.  You may need your directive TODAY.